Absolute Johannes factotum
- SCP-727-J (?)
- SCP-727-J is a massive, fiery celestial object, approximately 149.6 million kilometers from Earth and 1.39 million kilometers in diameter, which is actually the sun. Despite its apparent defiance of physics by not falling into Earth and generating flame without oxygen, it also has a psychic influence causing Earth to orbit it, and a mental trick that makes people think it orbits Earth. The Foundation is attempting to contain it within an impossibly large carbon steel cube, a project estimated to take 150 million years, and advises against looking at it during the day to avoid psychic attacks. Various absurd attempts to extinguish or destroy it, like using fire extinguishers or D-Class personnel told to "Stop, Drop, and Roll," have obviously failed.
- Dizzy Gillespie 1964 presidential campaign (?)
- The 1964 presidential campaign of jazz musician Dizzy Gillespie was a serious, independent write-in effort, initially sparked by humorous campaign buttons from his booking agency that raised money for civil rights organizations. Running with the slogan "Because we need one," Gillespie aimed to promote change rather than just seek publicity, proposing a cabinet composed entirely of musicians like Duke Ellington as Secretary of State and Miles Davis as Director of the CIA. He also pledged to rename the White House the "Blues House," provide universal housing and healthcare, and withdraw troops from Vietnam, though he eventually withdrew from the race.